1. |
Shedding Stability
04:57
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And I spent my days last summer hanging with my friends
Well that was when I felt just fine
I was never the one to make my mind up with all this fucking stress
These anxious thoughts and walls of shame
They fill my brain
And I'm trying hard to change
Well I spent my days this winter trapped inside my car
Cause "It's not safe to text and drive"
I can just roll around in my own fire and never put it out
These flames repel the world away and I think that that's okay
I don't think I'll ever change
And I think that you should know that I still love you all the same
So don't think I'm not your friend when I forget to make amends
I swear to god I'm still trying
And don't think I'll let you go, these steps were made of slippery stones
But I swear to god I'm still climbing
Don't think that I stopped caring Cause I want the best for all of you
If you want it
And I hope that I'll stop staring at the unlikelihoods that face me
They're scaring away my logic. I don't want this
We'd all refrain from picking up an object
that appears to be too heavy to handle
Believe me when I say, my head might appear to be as light as a feather
But I've bottled up so many sticks and stones
If you pick me up it'll break your bones apart
I want to apologize
And I'm wondering why you're wondering why
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2. |
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You cut a hole in the summer that splintered your mind
just to say you're fine
and do you remember who you are anymore
a good friend, a better man, with the best plan
It's hard to summarize all the steps up to your ignorance
and theres a reason that I say no to cigarettes
I already have too much on my chest
but you still fill your lungs with the smoke of a broken man's suffering
and something's got your tongue
before you can say to yourself that your eyes are too closed to open up
and it's so hard to watch you fall down
from the top of the world
to six feet underground
You showed the way you felt for a few days
and then you tried to drown it out
I guess it dragged the rest of you down
cause you slowly started to change your ways
and your constant intoxications turn into public demonstrations
of how you'll never make it out alive
and your heart's too drunk to let your brain drive
but your brain is deteriorating
as fast as my hope for you could bear
but that doesn't mean that I don't care, cause I still care
I'll always care
And you'll never make it out alive
And it' so hard to watch you fall down
from the top of the world
to six feet underground
but your blank stares don't mean your spaced out
They just play the flash backs
from before you broke down
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3. |
Temporary Terror
05:44
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It feels like the past few years have been a collage of old pictures
that I always tend to insert in my mind
a throw back to all the simple times
of camping out in my back yard as a kid
or going to a friend's house without having to ask
some stupid fucking question about SAT's
or what they want to major in, what am I gonna do
now that I'm approaching the end of high school
which has already fucked me hard
im not looking forward to a fresh new start in the race
because I'm already stuck at the starting line
so take what you want
fuck it take it all
I have no use of myself
but I can't be somebody else
And I've been sending in my college applications
without a destination
no sense of who I am, only dreams too big for action
I always told myself to dream big and never settle for anything less
well lately I can't settle for anything so I've been sitting at home in bed
I've called quits on all objectives, so whats the fucking point
I feel trapped within this mindset of a scared and lonely schoolboy
and one day I might just laugh at all the lines within this song
well that thought brings me solace, I hope that I find solace
There's overflowing thoughts inside my head
and they play on repeat but almost never willingly
and everything will be okay
thats what they all say
I wish this temporary terror would just fade away
And I live in the present not the future
and that single trait has sculpted me into a failure
The tidal wave, it can't be found
the day is good, at least for now
We're okay, we're okay
Now the tidal wave, is in line of sight
its beautiful, everything is alright
were okay, we're okay
Now the tidal wave, is getting close
it's safe to say that no one knows
if were okay. We're okay
Now the tidal wave, it crashes down
and everything gets swept out
we're not okay. We're not okay
And I've been sending in my college applications
without a destination
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4. |
Calluses
06:10
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Writing and Calluses
They symbolize all of this
all that I am, the only thing I'll ever be
But all of these calluses
Have been replaced by healthy skin
from the time that I've lost, if I got some back
It'd be like Christmas in October for me
We'd sit around and talk about old times before we grew up and changed
We'd settle down, I wish you could rewind the timelines
Cause I feel like nothing today, and I feel like
Maybe these calluses will grow back
Maybe I'll start to forget what is wrong with the world
Maybe these calluses will grow back
I don't want to start to forget what I could have been
When I was a little kid
I thought about losing my grip on everything else
I've gotten that wish
And I've gotten so sick of all of these distractions
They determine the other part of me
The necessities are getting so boring
And I know that I've lost my grip
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5. |
The Puppeteer
04:07
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I'm been replacing some perfect things
with pressured choices persuaded by the smirk on your face
Cause I just wanna change your expression
You tell me how you think I should be
selfish desires for control passed on as trying to be friendly
Well I can see through your intentions
Maybe I'm just tired of every fucking word you speak
You've broken through the surface
Well I won't let you take whats underneath my skin, my thoughts
the only sense of self that I've still got
You think you've got me around your finger
Well I can tell you think I'm slipping off
Cause you've been so much worse lately and I know you're scared
That I'll develop a mind of my own
one that can hold off your complacent tones
Your fuckin ego's the one thing left under your care
What am I to say
You take advantage of my blatant fears of
feeling even more stuck in the gutter
so when can I stop pretending I'm not
I've got a lot of things to say, but you'll never hear me speak
I'm putting messages in bottles that you'll never get to read
because I threw them in the ocean instead of leaving them at your door
Well I'm sorry I displease you
I'm sorry I'm a fraud
And I'm not the fucking puppet that you made me think I was
I'm sorry I've conditioned you into thinking you're the king of the world
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Milo Duhn Buffalo, New York
Alternative artist from Buffalo NY. Friendly neighborhood saltine trying his best.
Check me out on Facebook and Instagram. Email-duhnsongs@gmail
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